09/29/09
Sarah Newlin lends a hand to Vampire cause!
 Sarah rolls up her sleeve and prepares for atonement. | Shocking photos of the
Reverand Steve Newlin's wife have surfaced which suggest she has
finally seen the light... or at least shades of gray. Welcoming her to the dark side is would-be-toast Eric Northman, who could teach her husband a thing or two about forgiveness. Insiders say the sanguinary Swede probably wouldn't hold his planned crucifixion against Sarah.  |
Vampire Rights, continued Occasionally we attempt topics that aren't lascivious or borderline libelous. | Blood Brothers Reunited! |
"I wasn't sure if you'd remember me, Eric." "Of course I remember you. It's been... awhile" "Eh, 900 years or so. You clean up really well, bro. But then, you always were the golden boy." "Let it go, Håkan. Did you know that our father met the sun?"  |  "Yes, I heard. I'm sorry. I hadn't seen him for a few centuries, to be honest. Once Dad found you, I became the bastard step-child." "He was an amazing father, and you know it." "Would it have killed him to send a card now and then?" |
"You were always SO competitive, Håk. Everything was a pissing match - Dad, pussy, arm rings, loot, captured slaves, kills, you name it." "Good times, bro. Remember the drinking contests in the Long house? It only got worse after we got turned, used to drive Dad crazy. I'm surprised he didn't meet the sun a lot sooner."  |  "Eric, remember when this was taken?" "I do. We had just won first place in Bjorne the Berzerker's annual games. As I recall, Håkan, it was your personal best in the Toddler-Toss that put us over the top." "Proudest day of my life. But do I even get a pat on the back from Father? Hell no. The party was over shortly after that anyway. I think that buzzkilling Christianity stuff was getting to him." |
| Moderator: I could be wrong, but I don't think cameras were around back then? Anonymous: "You also thought that Columbus discovered America. Vikings were far more advanced than people realize." | |
| Moderator: Mr. Northman, is everything alright? Earth to Eric... "Don't worry, Eric will rejoin us shortly. He gets like that sometimes." |  |
"Hello, this is all very moving but can we get back to the topic of Vampire Rights?" "*beep* off, Flanagan." Moderator: The phones have been ringing off the hook with ladies who want to meet Anonymous. I guess you aren't really 'anonymous' anymore, Håkan. "Well, you can call me 'Hank', since the cat's out of the bag anyway. Hank sounds hotter and more masculine than Eric, don't you think?" |  |
Moderator: Is your last name Northman, like Eric's? "Please. If I told you his real name, he'd have me staked." Moderator: Well, thanks everyone, for such a thought-provoking discussion. | |
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